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Tuesday, August 13, 2013

Don't make your goal be "skinny"

Today I wanted to touch on goals and expectations.  I think they go hand in hand, when trying to lose weight.....

When I started losing weight I won't lie, I wanted to be skinny.  I wanted to be skinny because it would get me a boyfriend and everyone would like me.  Yep, when I was young, that is what I wanted.  It was all about vanity back then.  I would sit and look at my friends and wish so much I could be skinny, like them.  I was so jealous of all the attention they got.  I was jealous that they were never made fun of and people liked them, just based on their looks.  The funny thing is, I was popular too.  And maybe, just maybe, people liked me for me. But as we know, growing up is a BITCH! It's funny that now that I am fit, I do not like attention at all.  I get all nervous and just don't know how to act.  I am horrible in a crowd.  I don't know how to stand or where to look.  I am so awkward when it comes to that.  I know you are all thinking, "hmmm....really Lori, you don't like attention, but you will post a pic of you, in a bikini, on IG".  For me, that is just to show others, what my transformation is/was like.  I want people to see that at ANY age, you can have a fit body. is OK, not to like everything about your body.  Hell, I can't stand my thighs, they are saggy and have cellulite.  BUT....they are 100 times better than they used to be.  THIS is what I focus on now.  What I like about them, not what I don't like.  I like that they are long and that I can see some muscle definition.  I can walk without them rubbing together and starting a fire.  See this is way more fun that focusing on icky saggy skin and cellulite! :)
So if I can share my flaws with people and my success at the same time, maybe it will give someone else hope or motivation, to get started.  Maybe they will see me and go, "well she isn't perfect, BUT....she owns it and is healthy".  THAT IS WHAT WE ALL NEED TO DO!  Own the body you have.  No matter what phase of your journey, you are in. 


Another thing that works for me is making small goals.  One thing I have realized, just over the past few months, setting "small" goals, is easier to stick to.  For instance, instead of saying you are going to cut out all snacks, cut out one a day, for a week.  If you stick to that, then add another snack, for the next week.  Try doing one week of Ripped in 30, instead of saying you are going to stick to all 30 days.  Once you get passed week 1, set a new goal, to get through another week and so on.  If you want to kick your soda habit, do the same thing. Take baby steps, they lead to GIANT ones.  If you want to start eating clean, take it one day at a time or even one meal at a time.  Start out with a goal of eating one clean meal a day, for say 3 days. Once you hit that goal, add in 2 meals a day, for like 5 days.  It's so much easier to stick with something long term, if you go into taking baby steps.  I wish SO much I would have realized all of this 20 years ago. Instead of being healthy about my weight loss, and realizing it would in fact take a while, I went into it wanting a quick fix.  I wanted to be "skinny" over summer break and come back to school and wow everyone.  Oh dear GOD!  That kind of thinking just makes me sad.  My mom has always told me, "if losing weight was easy, honey, there would be no overweight people in the world."  AND....if shakes and pills worked, we would all be rail thin!  And she is so right.  It is NOT easy, but it is SO worth the hard work.  Oh and the whole, "but you don't understand" thing won't work on me. I understand it ALL!  I have tried it all, I have failed at it all, so I get it, I really do.  I know that it takes not only hard work and dedication, it takes the right mindset.  You MUST go into this with having your ultimate goal be, "a fit and healthy you".  Take that effing word "skinny" out of your vocabulary.   Don't even put a clothing size as a goal.  I think once we free our minds of all the "media expectations", everything starts to fall into place. Quit wanting to  look like so and so.  Your goal should truly be, to look like the best YOU, that you can.  And that does not mean a size 2!  The best you just might be a size 12.  As long as you FEEL good in your own skin, are exercising in some form, and eating things that will fuel your body, you are doing OK. 

Before I go, I will share some of my goals for August...

1. Continue to eat clean at least 5 days a week.

2. On the weekends, make at least one meal, 100% clean, each day.  This is almost always, breakfast for me.

3.  Mix up my workouts 100%.  This means doing something different every day of the week, 6 days a week.

4.  Eat what I want, with no guilt, one meal a week.  If I do more than that, I seriously feel like shit.  I am just at that point, where I can't handle all the processed crap.  This is a good thing! :)

5. Do 25  weighted squats, 25 weighted plié squats, 50 crunches with 10 pound dumbbell 5 days a week.

Ok there you have it!  I also want to do a lot of my workouts with the family. This will mean walks, bike rides and dancing our booties off, like no one is watching!  Oh yeah, we break it down at the Flip  house!



  1. You rock! That's all I'm going to say!

  2. Great advice! I can do this😊

  3. Amen! I got so obsessed with the number on the scale that I couldn't get past it. I read you blog, Mama Laughlin's and SkinnyMeg's and I'm hiding the scale now. I needed this today, thank you!

  4. Wow, I needed to read this!
    I've been doing the 30 day Shred DVD, last week I only got one workout in and not any for this week...yet. At first I was beating myself up over it but then I realized it was due to things out of my control. Shit happens and life happens!
    Thank for the tips!

  5. great post, given a lot to think about :)

  6. Great post and Thanks for this useful information..